Benefits of a small wedding

Weddings have gotten out of hand.  Our culture has migrated to the point where we have to constantly one-up each other.  And, in the process, things keep getting grander and grander.  The only problem is that you have to pay for it sooner or later.  While you keep planning and planning, an aunt suggests your wedding wouldn’t be complete without a certain element, and next thing you know, you’ve invited over 500 guests with a live band and a pony show! But it doesn’t have to be that way.  I understand the dilemma, but here’s something to ponder.  Small weddings have many benefits that can’t be rivaled.  

Here are some reasons to have a small wedding. 

Low cost: save money for your new start

A wedding symbolizes the beginning of a life together.  As such, it requires sound financial planning.  You do not want to start off your life journey together on the wrong foot: being in serious debt.    

Downpayment for mortgage

It’s every young couple’s dream to own their house someday.  However, we all know that houses aren’t cheap. In order to purchase your own house, you need to start saving early. There’s no secret about it. The more you save for the down payment you will be better able to handle the monthly mortgage payments.

Allocate money to more pressing needs

Everybody is supposed to have a budget. If you don’t, you are going to be in some serious trouble. Wedding preparation is no different. You have to start with a budget, and you have to make sure that your funds are allocated correctly. One major benefit of a smaller wedding is that the allegations amount does not have to be so big for each particular component. You are able to control the amount of allocation more freely.

You never know what other expenses might creep up

Even if you are the most immaculate budgeter, you are not perfect. So there are bound to be unforeseen issues that will creep up in your planning. These are beyond your control; you’ll just have to accept it. However, if you have a small wedding event you will be able to go to a better roll with the punches. 

No unnecessary financial burden to start a new life together

This is a hot-button issue. I remember watching an episode of Friends where Monica wanted to throw a really huge elaborate wedding, but Chandler put his foot down and said no.   Eventually, they were able to work it out and decided not to splurge on their wedding. Let’s just think about it. This is an important life lesson taught us here from the sages of TV!  Do you really want to start off your life together with a financial burden? Perhaps oh, you already have some. Frankly, I think it is wiser to start your new life together with one less burden. There is no reason why you cannot have a memorable, small wedding.  And also the flip side is true. Do not expect to have a memorable wedding just by spending a lot of money.

More intimate time with your families & close friends

Small weddings mean intimacy between newly formed relationships.  What’s greater than everyone present with one heart and mind, wishing the new couple with their blessings?  

My sis in law’s wedding had over a thousand guests!  I don’t think she even had time to greet each one; It was a chaotic sight. They had rented the banquet hall of a really huge church, and there were just so many people I don’t think she even knew or realized who half of them were. I mean the wedding wasn’t a failure, but I don’t think it is for everybody because you just end up creating a lot of people but there is an air of non-intimacy.

Everybody can be involved in the party

When the wedding party is small, everybody could be involved. No one would feel left out because everybody would be friends.  Only close ones would be invited and it would be very intimate.

Small weddings relieve party overcrowding that leads to stressful situations.  Oftentimes, at the wedding, you can feel like a total stranger even though you know the couple that is getting married. Now, sometimes it can be very magical and you meet people who are interesting. However, those occasions are rare, and you end up at a table with total strangers you have no rapport with.  Then, what do you do except sit there and try to make the best of a situation?

Small weddings dictate that you only invite those whom you have a deep connection: These folks can be truly happy for you.  I think it is human nature to truly be happy for somebody that you’re very close to when a good thing happens to them.  Especially on their special wedding day. 

Also, at some huge weddings, you are sitting so far back from the wedding party that you need binoculars.  I remember going to a wedding where I was sitting so far back at a table that it was difficult to see the wedding party.

Offer better quality meals & drink selection for your loved ones

Perhaps, you and your significant other first met at a little hole in the wall joint.  Wouldn’t it be awesome to have them cater your meals?  But some restaurants (perhaps your favorite) can only handle so many orders.  Well, if the wedding party was small, then this would be possible.

Smaller parties can mean much more gourmet/luxurious meals

Maybe you want to really splurge on a gourmet wedding meal that will blow the socks off of your guests?  Well, this would be impossible if your guest list was large.  However, for a small wedding, you could significantly improve the menu of your dinner.

Can increase cocktail service/greater choices

Same as above.  You can actually hire a bartender who knows his/her stuff.  How about making something so unique that will knock everyone’s socks off(not literally, of course)!

Can be more selective to guests’ dietary restrictions/tastes

Your guests don’t have to check boxes on their invitations for just steak or salmon.  Also, It’s a logistics issue.  When you have a small number of guests, then you can be more attentive to their dietary wants and needs.  I once went to a wedding where there was a sushi chef who custom-made orders for their guests.  It was pretty cool.  

Surprise guests with personalized items

The highlight of some wedding banquets is taking home a unique centerpiece floral arrangement for a lucky individual.  However, this is just not possible when the guest list is too large.  

Another fun thing you can do for a small wedding is named wedding favors such as napkins, wine glasses, coasters.  You can even go with fun name tags that will make it easier for guest seating arrangements.  

DIY wedding

Have a more personalized touch on every single detail of the wedding (flower, table setting, decor…) by Doing It Yourself and saving some money in the process!  Most DIY options are not available when the guest list is too large to handle, which is the very nature of DIY.  DIY weddings are great because you have complete control of the planning as well as getting enough help from your loved ones.  

Less stress not only for planning but also for the big day

Wedding day is stressful; there’s no doubt.   There’s bound to be something that will gnaw at you, no matter how carefully you and your friends plan.  But having a small wedding will definitely decrease the amount of stress that you will have to endure.  Here are some obvious ones:

Fewer invitations to send out

We’ve all made errors on documents, and we still make errors in spelling, calling people by the wrong names. It can’t be a good feeling to get an invitation with the wrong name. Your spouse’s name is spelled correctly, but your name is misspelled.  Now, I’m not saying that this won’t happen for a small wedding. We are all human beings.  However, if it is a fact that with the smaller sample size chance of making a mistake, the occurrences of error becomes smaller.

Less worry that you left someone out (by accident, of course)

There is always that dread: What if you left someone out? I invited you, but they’re waiting, but you did not invite them.  That awkwardness you meet them at a social gathering, and they know that you know that you forgot to invite them to yours. What do you do with the situation? Well now, if you had a very small wedding this would not be a problem. They will know and understand that you had very small wedding parties of family and close, close friends.

Leads to more enjoyment of wedding preparation

Unfortunately, young couples do not have a lot of money.  Sometimes, you really have to stretch the budget to make it go a long way.  My friend had a very small wedding while in grad school.  They didn’t spend a lot of money, but it was very sweet.  I’m sure it is a fond memory for them, even though it wasn’t glitzy at all, just close friends and family who cared deeply and helped them enjoy to the best of their abilities.  

Broader venue options

This opens up a whole host of possibilities.  Here are some examples: possible to hold in the backyard, some churches are small, at restaurants, beach locale, at a park!  The list goes on!  Your imagination is the limit (within reason, of course)!

I know of a couple who held the wedding in their living room.  It was during the pandemic and middle of a snowy winter, but still it must have been magical.  

More guest participation

At a small wedding, everyone can do something to make your wedding special so some folks don’t feel left out.   If you have a cousin who knows how to mix drinks, maybe she can bartend?  Or if your uncle is a music lover, perhaps he can DJ.

Final Reason

No wedding crashers!

In Conclusion

Weddings are supposed to be a special event that transforms a couple’s lives together.  It doesn’t require a huge bank account.  Instead, it needs care and assistance from the loved ones from the couple’s lives.  We often lose sight of the fact that money doesn’t equal care and love.  

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